Little Buffy's Indoor Games
Oh, those rainy afternoons when you can't go outside and there's nothing to do. How would a young slayer fill that time? Here are some of the indoor games that Little Buffy might have played with her family and friends, had they all been briefed much earlier on her status as "the slayer":
- Ouija Board - Whereas most children her age used the Ouija board to receive messages from the spirit world, Little Buffy used it primarily to send them. Most commonly: D-O-N-'T E-V-E-N T-H-I-N-K A-B-O-U-T C-O-M-I-N-G T-O S-U-N-N-Y-D-A-L-E, E-C-T-O--B-R-E-A-T-H, O-R E-L-S-E!
- Pin the Soul on the Vampire - He's got centuries of interesting life experience and the face of an angel. Unfortunately, his inner demon would rather rip into your neck with fangs than kiss it tenderly. Only your undying love (and gyroscopic sense of direction after being blindfolded and spun) can restore what he thought was lost forever. How will you know if you're successful? You'll know....
- Slew - A detective board game in which a prominent demon has been slain somewhere in Sunnydale. You must deduce who did it (Miss Summers, Colonel Giles, Reverend Angelus, Mademoiselle Rosenberg, Master Harris, or Senorita Chase). You must deduce where the slaying took place (Bronze, Band Room, School Stage, Cemetery, Ms. French's house, Underground Church, Funeral Home, Library, or Ben & Jerry's). And you must deduce what weapon was used (Stake, Crossbow, Holy Water, Exacto-knife, Cremation Furnace, Guillotine, Cymbal, Fire Axe, Pool Cue, or Nail File). Winner may elect to reenact slaying with fresh demon, if time permits.
- Where's Waldo's Body? - Separating the corpse of our little red-striped friend from those of all the high school students, teachers, and principals strewn all over Sunnydale is no easy task. Hey, everyone in this town ends up with red all over them! But don't give up, your patience will pay off in the end. Have you tried the school locker room yet?
- Spin the Crossbow - Someone has to wade through that sea of vampires outside the Library to go warn those kids at the Bronze about the coming Apocalypse. But suddenly there are no volunteers! Whomever the rotating medieval weapon stops on gets the job. Will it be you?
- Truth or Scare - In this circle game the rules are that each young slayer must either reveal an intimate detail of her personal life to the group, or else tell everyone some really creepy ghost story that will give them all bad dreams. As if there's a difference...
- Monopoltergeist - Ghostly visitors have taken up residence in houses and hotels on Boardwalk, Park Place, and other premium properties without paying any rent! Each player must attempt to slay them with weapons at hand, a battleship, an automobile, a scottie-dog, an enchanted top hat, and a cannon (or is it a plow?). But oh no! The stupid police don't understand and are taking you directly to jail for murder! Do not pass Go!
- Risk - Master piles up armies in his underground lair while Buffy and her gang collect their forces in the Library. But little do the Slayerettes realize that these two countries are actually right next to each other! Soon the Master attacks with all his troops! Thankfully, he isn't rolling the dice very well....
- Hearts - In this card game the Hearts suit represents the vampires. Each player must drive a toothpick through the little red symbols on every such card they are dealt, or risk having the Hearts convert the other suits to their blood-drinking ways.
- Codex, Codex, Who's Got the Codex? - Children chosen as "vampires" conceal a hefty book of ancient prophecy anywhere they can think of (under the couch cushions, in the fish tank, beneath the compost pile). Child chosen as "watcher" tries unsuccessfully to find it, until he or she finally enlists the aid of a "vampire in recovery."
- Crazy Gates - A card game in which the Master becomes the head of a vast software empire as part of his mad scheme to take over the whole world!
- Vampire, the Masquerade - All characters to whom the first word in the title refers are invariably dead by the end of the game whenever it's played by a little slayer.
- Tribble Pursuit - Little Buffy's idea for this board game did not come about until the Starship Enterprise once again blundered back into Earth's 20th century, bringing with it Sunnydale's most ravenous and prolific monsters to date. Guess who had to hunt those furry little demons down?
- Twister - You are sprawled on the plastic mat in a neck and neck game (literally), to the death, with some very competitive mantises. You twist here, you twist there. Suddenly the spinner stops on "twist head 180 degrees backwards" (hey, whose spinner is this anyway?). Time to think quickly or you'll lost your head. Wait, is that a machete lying in the box? (game includes machete).
- Shoots and Ladders - Players wend their way down intricate maze of stairs and passageways to confront the Master in his underground lair. Once there, they shoot at him with crossbows. But Master catches all their bolts and declares "Thanks, because of your bravery in coming here, I win!" Or, so the fossil thinks....
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Little Buffy's Schoolyard Games
Grade school can be such a difficult time for children, all the new faces, all the socialization skills to learn. Outdoor games can be one of the best ways for children to "break the ice" with one another. Here are some of that games that Buffy and her classmates might have played on the Sunnydale Elementary School playground (affectionately known to them as the "slayground") had they all known of Buffy's most remarkable destiny:
- Hide and Stake - One child is chosen as "slayer." Other children are "vampires" who hide and pray desperately that slayer will not find them to perform his or her "duty" with genuine stake.
- Lopscotch - Child chosen as "it" places his or her head in aspiring young magician's guillotine.
- Ring around the Mantis - Class participation game designed to help children overcome their fears of replacement teachers.
- Dead Rover, Dead Rover - Vampires line up opposite zombies and each side sends members over to crash through the linked hands of the other side (vampires usually win as zombies' hands inevitably come off).
- Poison Tag - Winner is child most adamant in refusing Koolaid "refreshments" offered by opposing side.
- Dodge Ball - For maximum enjoyment, a class field trip to the city zoo is recommended prior to playing this game.
- Freeze Tag - Child chosen as "it" pursues other children carrying a severed Medusa head.
- Marcie Polo - Swimming pool game in which child chosen as "it" stares with wide open eyes right at other participants (who choose not to call out anything) and never finds them.
- Capture the Codex - Child chosen as "Angel" attempts to retrieve ancient text of questionable prophetic value from other children designated as "Angel's former friends, the vampires."
- Horror Square - Each child attempts to prevent ball from being bounced through his or her quarter of a larger square. Winners are taken by Luke, the playground coordinator, to participate in a special presentation on the school stage.
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Little Buffy's TV Programs
It is not uncommon for Watcher groups to work closely with television stations to prepare special TV programming (accessible only with a very special cable box) that can both entertain young slayers and also help prepare them for their ultimate roles. Here are some of the shows that Buffy might have watched as a young girl, had she and her parents only known much earlier of her true "calling"
- Seppuku Street - A little slayer convinces known alley demons such as The Count, Cookie Monster, and Oscar the Grouch to kill themselves rather than face her wrath.
- Barney and Victims - The purple and green one was forced to drink some of Master's blood (after Master sampled a few gallons of his). Now it's up to the young slayer to end Barney's horrifying new mantra of "I feed on you, you feed on me!"
- Veinamaniacs - Little slayer goes undercover as a "toon" to stop new breed of zany animated characters who lull children into false sense of humorous security with crazy antics and then move in on exposed young jugulars with cartoon fangs bared!
- New Adventures of Winnie who Slew - "Rabbit" exchanged blood with a rabid heffalump during a wicked fight and now it's up to our little honey-eater to protect the rest of the animals from what's become of his former friend.
- Little Normal Nonfighting Turtles - Program that reminds young slayers of the more customary role of domestic tortoises, that of pets, and not of pizza-eating allies in the world of fighting evil.
- Ghoulhouse Rock - Grotesque monsters scream alphabet lessons and multiplication tables in the form of death-metal lyrics to terrified toddlers, and threaten to "pay a visit" to any children who don't memorize them "after their parents are asleep."
- Mr. Rogers Slayhergood - Venerable watcher Fred Rogers advises young slayers on how to recognize and terminate youthful-looking girl vamps, such as Darla, who might attempt to infiltrate slayerette groups by posing as friends and classmates.
- Leave it to Cleaver - Young slayer demonstrates week after week that decapitation is just as effective for killing vamps as staking, wielding an impressive array of butchers' implements in the process.
- Slayer Moon - Lycanthropy, Japanimation, and untimely lunar phases mix into a deadly cocktail of childhood terror for one young slayer, and time is running out for her school...
- Dead of the Class - Situation comedy that helps young slayers recognize which children in their school are living, breathing, reflection-casting human beings like themselves, and which ones aren't.
- Slayed by the Bell - It's big, it's heavy, it sits up in the belfry doing nothing most of the day, and it can be called upon for lightning-fast decapitations in a pinch.
- Lamb Chops' Slay-along - Animated sheep cutlets demonstrate methods of eliminating vampires while young slayers stake away in time to the aerobics beat of the soundtrack.
- The Magic Ghoulbus - Education and transportation don't mix when the students' favorite vehicle gets bitten by a zombie and turns into a flesh eating kidtrap!
- Mighty Moloch Power Rangers - A ancient demon gets uploaded onto the Internet and into the power suits of the Rangers. Only the little slayer can prevent her crime-fighting pals from becoming pawns in the horned-one's twisted plans.
- Romper Doom - Smiling, pleasant-faced hosts lead toddler guests into situations from which they never return, that is, until a baby slayer is mistakenly invited onto the show...
- Sabrina's Mom the Teenage Witch - Mom decides Sabrina is wasting her youth hanging out with loser friends when she could be leading cheers and bagging quarterbacks. So she declares "Step aside dear, I'll show you how it's done!" in a clear case of premeditated Freaky Friday. You thought Mom wanting to borrow your clothes was a pain? Try this!
- Pee-Wee's Slayhouse - The goofy adult host seems pretty harmless with his corny bow tie and silly laugh. But look closer and you'll notice his corpse pale skin, blood-red lips, and an actor who played a vampire heavy in the big Buffy movie! Only the little slayer can put a frown onto Pee-Wee's fruitpunch mouth before he laughs all the way to the blood bank (where he plans to make a few withdrawals from the accounts of his children guests)!
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Little Buffy's Movies
"Hey Mom and Dad, can we go to the movies this weekend?!" Children are entranced by the make-believe world that films create, and little slayers are no different. But the worlds portrayed in movies for little slayers must be somewhat different than the worlds portrayed for other children, because the worlds they will grow up into will be quite different as well. Here are some of the films the Summers family might have gone to see with Little Buffy, had they only known she was "the slayer."
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- Buffy and the Beast - A wild and happy-go-lucky vampire is cursed by bitter gypsies with the return of his guilt-ridden human soul. Now he spends all his days brooding in a lonely apartment. Only the freely given love of a beautiful young woman (the town's slayer) can lift the curse and return him to his former crazy and carefree ways. At which point she'll have to kill him....
- Citizen Slain - Charles Foster Spike, wealthy and bloodthirsty owner of evening newspaper "The Sunnydale Scream" implements a ruthless new policy of "forced subscriptions" which threatens to drain all readership from the local slayer's fledgling morning paper, "The Daily Sun." In a bold display of business "hackumen," the slayer confronts her sneering rival with a medieval beheading axe, declaring "There's always more than one way to eliminate the competition, Chuck"
- Drusilla, Queen of the Bronze - Sunnydale's favorite (and only) teen afterhours haunt, The Bronze, has just taken a bold step by hiring its first-ever female impersonator entertainer (Jaye Davidson). Strangely enough, no one has ever seen this new performer by the light of day. "She" can do nearly flawless impressions of Lily Munster, Morticia Addams, and (of course) Elvira, but how come her audiences always seem to die laughing?
- The Vampire Strikes Back - "A few days ago in a tiny town just an hour away..." Little Princess Slayla is informed by her leathery green watcher, Yopert, that she must drive a shining lightstake through the heart of her father-turned-bloodsucker, Darth Vampyre. "If you fail, the whole town will run red with the blood of high school athletes," he warns. Can Slayla really kill Darth, the only family she has ever known? (and is a town free of high school athletes really such a bad thing?). Then she recalls the times Father would choke her with The Force whenever she refused to eat her peas. "Say Yopert, where's that lightstake again?"
- Slime Cop - "Ghostbusters" meets Jean-Claude VanDamme when modern day poltergeists (or should we say, "ectoplasmic Americans"?) use Sunnydale's Hellmouth to go back in time and bring History's most famous ghosts into the present for nefarious purposes. Hamlet's Father, Patrick Swayze, and that guy who bothered Mrs. Muir are among their intended acquisitions. Only a little kickboxing girl from Belgium's "Temporal Investigations" Bureau can convince these slimeballs "there's no future in time travel!"
- Kiss the Boys (and make them shrivel) - A centuries-old Peruvian mummy (Tiffani Amber Thiessen) just wants to be like any other normal high school girl. But to do so she leaves in her wake a string of desiccated boyfriends like so many emptied juice boxes in a high-school lunchroom. The local slayer (Ashley Judd) is baffled as to how to recognize and terminate Little Miss "Candy from the Andes" before she strikes again. And the danger is closer to home than she realizes! Her only hope lies in Xander Harris (Morgan Freeman), "the boy who got away."
- From Here to Fraternity - Young Alex Harris (Frank Sinatra), a poor kid from the wrong end of town, is dying to belong to the local college's elite fraternity, Kamma Feeda Kobra. Nothing would impress his critical father more. After an exotic and seductive drag routine for the frat brothers during pledge week, he finally gets his coveted invitation. His first pledge task, however, is to feed the fraternity's friendly reptilian mascot ('Mackie') it's "special diet" down in its basement home. Soon, Alex is conflicted. Sure, the free beer and sorority girls are great, but are they really worth his mortal soul? Tough call! Is this the perfect excuse to finally see a peer counselor?
- 101 Hyenas - Sunnydale High's militant Vegetarian Club (just over a hundred strong) decides to protest at the City Zoo because live racehorses (just past their prime) are being fed to the zoo's mysterious new hyenas. An unfortunate scuffle between demonstrators and zoo security guards at the edge of the hyena pit, however, triggers a tragic transpossession from the hyenas to the club members. In a cruel twist of irony, these former animal lovers and meat-refusers are now reduced to gorging themselves on stolen hotdogs, terrifed school mascots, and ultimately, their own stunned principal (whose bitter aftertaste no amount of carrot juice will ever wash away!).
- Vampire Records - The teen salesclerk behind the cash register sports a deathly pallor and crimson lips. Just another goth-kid working for minimum wage? Guess again! The bloodsuckers who operate this CD outlet are out to drain their customers of more than just their hard-earned entertainment dollars! Why hasn't the fact that the joint has no windows nor security mirrors tipped anyone off yet? Sure, they have great selection and are open till midnight. But God help any shoppers left in the store at closing time!
- Sixteen Blowtorches - Samantha (Molly Ringwald) is a young slayer whose duty has destroyed her social life to the point that she is spending her sixteenth birthday all by herself. As she prepares to blow out the candles on her cake, her cute brooding vampire friend, Jakelus (Michael Schoeffling), bursts in to warn her that sixteen vicious vampires are coming to "crash" her little party. Rest assured, they'll want to consume a bit more than cake! As the vamps smash through her picture window, Samantha thinks quickly and whips out a can of hairspray from her purse, spraying it over the burning candles to create a searing blastfurnace of birthday incineration. Voila! Sixteen crispy vamp-kabobs for party latecomers Ted "The Geek" Harris (Anthony Michael Hall) and little sister Sara (Alyson Hannigan) to enjoy! At least the day wasn't a total disaster.
- Desperately Seeking Darla - Angelus the Vampire has been released from that pesky gypsy curse that restored his human soul by the liberating love of a beautiful young slayer whom he suckered into falling for him. Now with the curse and the slayer out of the way, he frantically searches for his old partner in crime and former supernatural squeeze, Darla, the "Belle of Budapest." His excitement grows as he races to the underground, eager to re-consummate their relationship, already hearing her deadly dulcet tones again in his mind. Then he halts in horror, remembering to his dismay that he killed her. Doh!
Little Buffy's Vacation Spots
Where does a young Slayer go to unwind when she's not "on patrol"? Whether hanging in Sunnydale, or going on a trip with her family, here are some of the places Little Buffy might have enjoyed going to "get away from it all," had she and her loved ones only known sooner she was to rid the world of vampires, demons, and the forces of darkness:
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- The Vampire State Building - Now why would Little Buffy want to spend her free time in a building that is infested with nothing but wall-to-wall bloodsuckers? Quite simply, it's a fifteen hundred foot pillar of concentrated targets, who have very few escape routes other than the front door. Little Buffy likes to think of it as a giant upside-down vampire Pez dispenser. Betcha can't slay just one!
- Demon Marcus Department Store - It's midnight at the pet cemetery. A dying vampire Rottweiler rips Little Buffy's favorite black slaying jumper just after she stakes him. Now she looks terrible! What if Little Angel comes by? Where is she going to find a replacement (blood-resistant), with matching splinter-proof gloves, at this hour? The question is rhetorical, because she knows there's only one place she can go... And they even take "Master" Card.
- Ben and Scary's Ice Cream - Ben, the day manager of Sunnydale's fave ice cream joint is jovial and kind. But at sundown, his sinister business partner "Scary" takes over the store to handle the night crowd, and it's a whole new ball of wax (or is that "house of wax"?). Suddenly the store becomes the place for Bronze pickup artists dressed in yesterday's fashions to bring their newly acquired "dates," and Scary just looks the other way. Gone are the friendly flavors of the daylight hours, replaced now by "Bury Garcia," "Bloody Monkey," and "Clearcut Forest Crunch." (Patrons getting ice cream on their noses are advised to not let any other customers in the store help them wipe it off!)
- Stakey's Pizza Parlor - Old Man Stakey had a rep for throwing one mean pizza crust. So much so that he was rumored to be able to decapitate young punk vampires who came in to harass his customers with it, especially if the crust was running slightly stale that day. "No real skin off my nose," he'd remark, "those vamps are lousy tippers anyway!" Little Buffy would beg her parents to take her to see the old man in action, learning techniques she would later apply to music cymbals and other weapons. Also didn't hurt that Stakey always gave her a free "Herbert" style combo pizza with extra bacon whenever she showed up just to idolize him!
- Jugular Park: The Lost World - "When Vampires Ruled the Earth..." reads a sign in the visitors center (a fact the vampires don't like to be reminded of). Remotely-controlled tour vehicles guide visitors past live vampires lurking in re-creations of their natural habitats: graveyards, darkened nightclubs, earthquake-leveled Budapest. "Oh look, on your right, there's a vampire bringing down a human being. Brutal, yes, but Nature in all her majesty!" (Guests are strongly advised not to feed the vampires, however cute they may appear to be). Unfortunately, the park has been closed ever since a disgruntled employee turned off the holy water moats, lowered the garlic fences, and opened the cross-encrusted gates, allowing the "residents" to escape. Little Buffy had to be deputized as an honorary "vampherd," rounding up the errant critters, or else making "alternate arrangements" for them.
- Yellowbones National Park - A crack team of archeologists has finally managed to reassemble the mysterious powdered ancient bones found recently in an abandoned Sunnydale warehouse. Sure enough, the finished skeleton is that of the fabled, long-extinct, five-toed subterranean ground sloth (Slothus Mastericus). Strangely, none of these hypothetical beasts were believed to have migrated as far west as California in their heyday. In honor of the Wyoming location where the species is thought to have orginated, the fossil skeleton has been placed on display by the Forest Service there, quickly becoming a sort of unofficial park mascot. Some admirers have gotten carried away, however. Especially that weird little boy and his creepy friends who kept dragging unconscious people in to see the carcass, even suspending them above it for a better view (until he mysteriously just stopped coming around one day).
Little Buffy's Foods
How does a little slayer keep up her strength between grueling kiddie kills? Why, a well-balanced diet of course! Here are some of the delectable dishes that Buffy might have enjoyed as a child, had she and her family only known much earlier that she was destined to become a vampire vanquisher:
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- Vamp-Ka-Bobs - Not many things are more mouthwatering than a little vampire sizzling slowly on the end of a stake in heat of the afternoon sun. Just don't place that stake too close to its heart or cook it more than a second, or you'll end up with a plate of unappetizing smoking dust and ash! What a way to ruin a picnic (even the ants will complain)!
- Stake and Bake - As we all know, there are four ways to kill a vampire, staking, sunlight, burning, and beheading. Why not combine two of those ways into a delicious dinner recipe? After staking firmly (again, not too close to the heart if you want any meat left), simply cover the wounded vamp in bread crumbs, seal it into an oven bag, and cook at 1500 deg F for about a second (if vamp catches fire, reduce heat as this will ruin the flavor). Bon Appetit!
- Mantis Louis - Break out the machetes and put on your bibs, because this is one messy treat! Don't let the hard, serrated shell fool you. Properly prepared, the soft meat lurking beneath is succulent, tender, and tastes just like chicken (as Little Xander Harris can no doubt attest). Plus, precision hacking by Xander and Little Buffy (enough to make any Benihana chef jealous) should mean plenty of legs for everyone! Accompanying eggs may be poached and served in a light hollandaise (it is strongly advised that they not be undercooked). Hey, why not eat French tonight?
- Chicken Dumbo - The Bad News: An experiment gone bad in the high school science lab has unleashed a 4,000 pound, demon-possessed chicken onto the streets of Sunnydale. The Good News: Serves 1000! Little Rupert must now scour his books of arcane watcher lore to find the proper recipe for preparing and cooking this windfall "poultrygeist." Word on the street is it tastes just like elephant....
- Lice-A-Roni - The Order of Taraka was livid when Little Xander & Cordy so unceremoniously squashed their dreaded worm-man assassin without receiving so much as a scratch themselves. So the Order has dispatched an even worse villain to Sunnydale, one composed entirely of those irritating little bugs that usually infest one's scalp (requiring the use of foul-smelling chemicals and tiny painful combs). Fortunately, the critters can be boiled and combined with savory flavor packets to create an unexpectedly mouth-watering regional sidedish. Sprinkle liberally with powdered "Rid" for that perfect accent (and just in case any of the little buggers survived boiling). Can't you just hear the commercial jingle now? "Lice-A-Roni, the Sunny-Hellmouth treat. Lice-A-Roni, the parasites you eat..."
- Key Slime Pie - Wolfgang Puck teamed up with Buffy & Co. to produce this refreshing dessert from the aftermath of Eyghonesque demonic possessions. Cold, green, and oozing, just how half of Sunnydale likes it. Care for another slice?
- Sunnydalight Orange Citrus Drink - A parched little slayer needs something to wash down all of the above delicacies, and there's nothing quite like "Sunny D" to dissolve most anything that might be clinging to the insides of her mouth. Has the added benefit of making potential vampire "admirers" lose all interest in what's left of her blood. Comes also in "Creamy Crimson" flavor for the discerning oral phlebotomist.
Little Buffy's Toys
As innocent as they may seem, toys frequently help prepare children for the roles they will assume as adults. Little Buffy's toys were no exception. Here are some of the highly specialized playthings the Summer's family might have given Buffy when she was little, in anticipation of her upcoming responsibilities, had they known she was "the chosen one."
- Stake and Spell - Juggling school homework with vampire hunting has always been a challenge for little slayers. This portable device allows them to learn the letters forming countless English words in those brief breaks they get in between kills. Say, can you spell "exsanguination"?
- Etch A Wretch - This permanent marking toy utilizes holy water and a needle-sharp cross to let young slayers tag various supernatural creeps for future identification by watchers (and Interpol, of course).
- Chatty Cordy - The little doll that never knows when to stop talking! Comes in a two-pack with a Ripley (from 'Aliens') doll who regularly has to tell Cordy, "Sit down, shut up, and do exactly what I tell you, or you'll get us all killed!"
- Easy-Stake Oven - Vampires, you gotta stake 'em, decapitate 'em, or burn 'em. This "Little Miss Homestaker" kitchen appliance takes care of the last option with the sizzling heat of a 40 watt lightbulb. May those vamps roast in gingerbread hell! (Warningta stake 'em, decapitate 'em, or burn 'em. This "Little Miss Homestaker" kitchen appliance takes care of the last option with the sizzling heat of a 40 watt lightbulb. May those vamps roast in gingerbread hell! (Warning - cooking of bloodsuckers larger than mosquitoes, leeches, and small bats not recommended due to limited oven capacity. 40W lightbulb not included)
- Air Jordan Pogo Stick - Yet another in the seemingly endless line of product endorsements by the sky-leaping basketball great one. This nifty toy allowed Buffy to clear the top of the towering gate in her kindergarten (for vampire hunting), long before her little legs grew capable of doing the task on their own.
- Barbie the Vampire Slayer (and Vampire Ken) - Vamp terminator Barbie has fallen in love with a guy from the wrong side of the tracks, the dead side! "You're the slayer, Ken's a vampire. You know what you must do!" scolds her watcher father, G.I. Joe. The little blonde doll now has to choose between her heart and her duty. It's all so confusing! Maybe a new swimsuit and a trip to the beach in her Camaro will help clear her head?
- Judge Roy Bean Jump Rope - Perfect for practicing the timing needed to leap above that occasional mantis paw which can sweep across the floor out of nowhere to trip you up! Also hogties kiddie vamps who have claws for hands in a pinch! Part of any prepared young slayer's utility belt!
- Deadly Ruxpin - Load the little bear's program tape and listen to him recite apocalyptic passages from the Codex while he rolls his yellow eyes and bares his razor-sharp fangs at appropriate moments for emphasis.
- "Josie and the Pussycats" Junior Drum Set - Centerpiece of the grade school band "Buffy and the Slayerettes" which provided much needed recess diversion on the school's fear-ridden slayground (guitar solos by Little Xander Harris). Plus, those 'shiny brass things' could be taken off their stands and flung like frisbees on a moment's notice to provide young vampires with rather cymbalic deaths. Heads up!
- Supernatural Soaker - Just fill the vast reservoir of this combat-ready squirtgun with holy water, locate a few young vampires loitering on school grounds, and let the games begin!
- Master's "Grow it Yourself" Leech Colony - Pour enclosed egg packs into a wading pool of fresh warm water. After a few days, invite unsuspecting neighborhood kids in for a screaming good time! Be the first (and last) on your block to have one. (Transfusion kits available for a nominal fee).
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